Those rolled edges on the posture collars look more like piping with some sort of padding, but I could be wrong. Check out upholstery stores, they make something called "mopcord" or welting cord in different thickness and spongy-ness. As far as appropriate goes for fetish gear, I think it's better to be sure that the wearer isn't injured by accident or from poor workmanship.
However, keep in mind: the more simple you make your items (grooving/bevel/etc), the more likely they are to last. Stitching does come loose, and I find that my clients get very attached to gear - especially when it's made custom order. I've had more than a few folks come to me with other peoples items and beg me to fix mistakes, filling my ears with complaints of the salient details of how it failed.
Also, if you find the maker of those spikes in pic 3.. mommy want. :D