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Posted

From the ' comix' in our weekend paper: A few ladies talking around a table: 

Lady one: " My Mother said if you really wanted one , I'd have feed it, play with it and clean up its mess" 

Lady two: " so, you're getting a puppy?? " 

Lady one: " no a husband"  .

One for the ladies:

'What do you call that useless piece of skin at the end of a penis?'

'A Man ' 

HS

 

' I have a very gweat friend in Wome called Biggus Dickus,

He has a wife you know, do you know whats she's called? Incontinentia.......Incontinentia Buttocks '  :rofl:

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Posted

 'The sheriff goes into the saloon,  walks up to the bar,and said to the barman and said, " I'm looking for a man with a brown paper  hat, brown paper boots, , brown paper shirt, and  brown paper pants" 

' the barman says, "what do you want him for?' " 

"Rustlin'  " 

Ahem...

HS

' I have a very gweat friend in Wome called Biggus Dickus,

He has a wife you know, do you know whats she's called? Incontinentia.......Incontinentia Buttocks '  :rofl:

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Posted

A man and his beautiful but kind of dim witted wife were sitting having breakfast together one morning, he was reading the morning news when he says to his wife, well… looks like there was a plane crash yesterday, says here that there were a lot of injuries and two Brazilian people were killed. His wife started crying and sobbing and her husband asked her what was wrong, she said that’s awful, how many is a Brazilian?

  • CFM
Posted

I'm not a procrastinator, I just like to plan ahead.

Worked in a prison for 30 years if I aint shiny every time I comment its no big deal, I just don't wave pompoms.

“I won’t be wronged, I won’t be insulted, and I won’t be laid a hand on. I don’t do these things to other people, and I require the same from them.” THE DUKE!

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Posted

A young kid was looking at a memorial plaque that was at the back of the church.

The priest came over, and they boy asked, "What are all these names, Reverend?"

"Those are the names of men who have died in the service," the priest replied.

The boy's eyes got really big. "Which service, Reverend - the 8:30 or the 10:30?" 

 

For the horse riders on this forum (yes, I know what this feels like...)

 

Horse pulled groin.jpg

  • Contributing Member
Posted

Yesterday a hunter came round to sell me some meat

He offered me 8 legs of venison for $500

Do you think thats too dear?

Al speling misteaks aer all mi own werk..

  • CFM
Posted
7 minutes ago, fredk said:

Yesterday a hunter came round to sell me some meat

He offered me 8 legs of venison for $500

Do you think thats too dear?

:thumbsup:   yes it is a leg of venison should be........... under a buck.

Worked in a prison for 30 years if I aint shiny every time I comment its no big deal, I just don't wave pompoms.

“I won’t be wronged, I won’t be insulted, and I won’t be laid a hand on. I don’t do these things to other people, and I require the same from them.” THE DUKE!

  • CFM
Posted
2 hours ago, Sheilajeanne said:

One for deer hunting season:

 

 

deer season Home Depot.jpg

LOL i have three freezers and two fridges in my kitchen. 

Worked in a prison for 30 years if I aint shiny every time I comment its no big deal, I just don't wave pompoms.

“I won’t be wronged, I won’t be insulted, and I won’t be laid a hand on. I don’t do these things to other people, and I require the same from them.” THE DUKE!

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